There are times we are rushing around “doing” instead of being, involved in this that and the other thing that is somewhat important, but still … It’s all really just running. Running from intimacy. It’s typically thought to be a male problem, to sometimes be too busy to stop and look deep into the eyes of their lover, to lose themselves there, and to “feel” deeply for that person in that moment. Women are thought to crave this more, and have the ability to sustain emotional intimacy longer. However I have noticed myself lately in this “busy” and disengaged place from the Lover of my soul in whom I have so often delighted. Never that I stop loving Him, adoring Him, and knowing that He is in me and I in Him. But I speak of something far more intimate than a “positional” or “legal” place of being married to Christ, but of the actually emotional connectivity and energy that I have to gaze in His face when I first wake up, reach out to embrace Him, and to really “feel” the wonder of our mutual love. This is what some might call “adult imagination,” but what God has put into the heart of children is a foretaste of reality. They imagine things by faith, and live out what they believe in their actions.
So if you too are starting to come out of that dry place in your relationship with Jesus, hear the words of John saying, “Go back and do those first things that you first did when you were first in love.”
Hold his hand. Read Him a love poem, or listen to the one He wrote for you. Observe closely the sunset He painters for you and praise one of the many details He put into it. Talk with Him. Snuggle in His warm embrace.
When you remember the place of romance with the Lord, you find all of your deep places fully satisfied.
His Secret Garden 
so true…we spend a lot of time chasing the wind in this world…so good to get into a quiet place with Christ and bask in His love and grace.
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I think us men-folk tend toward self-sufficiency, where we take pride in our abilities and accomplishments, moreso when we overcome a problem or difficult situation by the BFM (Brute Force Method). Because of that tendency, in me at least, I’ve tended to have a somewhat separatist view of my relationship with the Lord – as in “these are things I do with the Lord” and “these are things I do alone” or with the Lord’s help when I invite Him to help after I run into trouble. And He is ever teaching me that He is with me in all things.
One of the more memorable (teachable) examples of that for me, was in trying to figure out a guitar part for a song I would be performing with a friend for a church service. I play well enough, in a James Taylor kind of style – but the song my friend wanted to sing, moved along at such a fast clip and the chord changes were such a stretch, I was struggling and growing frustrated. Finally the Lord interrupted me:
“Do you want me to show you how to play that?”
It blew my little mind there on the spot – for until that moment, I’d never thought of the Lord as a guitar-player.
“Yes!”
And instantly I saw in my spirit, the hand motions, the chord inversions that made playing the song far more simple.
In the years since, He’s helped me with car and home repairs, finding things, such that I’ve learned He is with me always. Of course, that means a lot of our relationship, as a man, is in the capacity of me “doing” things, so He is always about teaching me to be in relationship with Him in the capacity of simply “being”.
My thoughts go to my grandpa, who when I was young, took me lake fishing 2-3 times every summer. He was such an observant, contemplative and quiet person and I was so at peace just being with him in the boat, fishing. There was connection, even while there was no or little talking. Just the pointing of a rod tip, to point out an iridescent dragon fly perched on the rail of the boat. He did a lot to teach me quiet contemplation and often my relationship with the Lord is like that. I do wonder sometimes whether I ask the Lord enough questions – though I’m more inclined to simply take it all in with internalized awe and wonder …
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Jack, thank you for sharing these lovely thoughts and stories here! What you shared reminds me of something a friend said, “If God loves me like I love my own children, then a great deal of the theology I was taught is dead wrong.”
From observing loving parenthood, it encourages a combination of both allowing a child to do things on their own, and being there if they want advice. I used to worry about the difference, but am more confident in “Christ in me” than I was in my early days of religious upbringing, when it was more about external performance to please Him, as if He was separate from me. It is truly good news, that we are “One” with Him. <3
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I have received a fire hose of good advice today but this is by far the best and the only advice and place that a broken heart can be mended. <3
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